The long and winding road of thought.

I just...can't. Those days you wake up, it's cloudy, it's rainy. The bed seems to have a grip on you that's seriously nondetachable  If it was up to me, I would skip all my classes for the next three weeks and just sleep. I don't get much of that anymore.
What I really wanted to say though, was that I find it interesting that the colder it gets, the more difficult it is to move, to breathe. Maybe it's the air up here, or the food, or the tests, quizzes, papers. I couldn't tell you exactly what it is, but getting out of bed in the morning? The most difficult part of my day.
School feels like I'm shell-shocked. It feels like the world is calling my name, but I just can't answer it.  Everything I hand in is not good enough. Nothing is good enough. The world's still spinning though right? I didn't miss anything...did I?
I'm missing a lot these days. I don't know why everyone thinks I'm about to cry. People keep asking me, "Are you okay?" Am I okay? Who knows for sure? I don't.
I should know, shouldn't I? I should know what's going on with my life, or how I'm doing in school. I don't, unfortunately. I can't even motivate myself to do math, to do anything.
I have said I...too many times in this post.
What I'm getting at is the ultimate question? Is this a problem...or are there just people that don't look at the world around them and marvel?
People write about how they see things and they're so beautiful. I've written a couple of those myself. Through writing I feel...but I'm just not feeling it anymore. Beautiful. We call so many things by this word. Do we know what it means? Can we define it? Explain it? Is it possible that this thing we call beauty is so subjective that it is something we created ourselves, in our own minds? Poems, stories, movies, books, all immortalize this thing we called beauty. This term. This...adjective...form of praise. What is it? Is it possible that its is located in all of us?

These are the questions I throw out there for the cosmos to answer. Maybe one day I'll get an answer.